NO SLIP. NO BOUNCE.
ALL POLARIZED. ALL FUN
Carl the Flamingo once tried to market a portable record player that you could strap to your arm to play your favorite vinyl while you run. He called it a WINGMAN. (If you're an eagle-eyed hipster creeper you may have peeped the prototype once upon a time!!!) Carl insists that vinyl is the superior format for everything, which is why he designed these slick I Have These on Vinyl, Too sunnies. According to Carl, even these sound better on vinyl too.
My basement — okay, my parent's basement — is like a museum of the greatest records of all time. You probably haven't heard of most of these bands. They're super obscure. You've never heard of The Schlubers?! How about Patty and the Farts? Dynamo Eggo? Flip The Sash? Go-Go Ratchet? Stubby Little Teeth? Sad Saturn? Raveyard Blues? They're groundbreaking. Come over and listen. These sunnies won't slip or bounce while you feel superior to everyone. (Although, once you find out about this music, it's no longer cool.)